tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-84088679030619506982024-02-20T03:07:59.841-08:00Read My DiaryReal diary of a 30 something in the 80'sKellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.comBlogger257125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-90199005538149120962010-07-13T19:05:00.000-07:002010-07-13T19:15:31.492-07:0010/15/2003<br /><br />My mom is in this place in Sonoma now. I thought this was going to be good because I don't have to drive so far but when I go visit she pleads with me to get her out of there.<br />Yesterday I walked in and they had her all dressed in some freakin costume bed jacket weird ass shit. Very disturbing, do they do this for fun? <br />I want her out of there. Then I notice this cut on her upper lip and she told me they cut her shaving her??????<br />She was released from the Smith Ranch facility "AMA" against medical advice, she wanted to go home so we got her home and I made sure there was a ton of food and everything she would need for the weekend. She said she just wanted to be alone in her house with her cats.<br />So all weekend I am calling..... no answer... every day calling no answer, same with Auntie Bonnie, so finally Auntie Bonnie goes over Monday and finds her laying on the living room floor, fell out of the wheel chair.<br />FUCK<br />Paramedics come and take her back to Kaiser but then that ran out and now she is in this creepy freak show old folks piss smellin place in Sonoma.<br />I meet with some social worker. I ask what is wrong with my mother?<br />What are we dealing with?<br />I get no answers.<br />What I want to know is what is going on here? What am I dealing with?<br />Is this the end?Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-54028928474513474042010-07-04T19:25:00.000-07:002010-07-04T19:35:48.399-07:0010/2/2003<br /><br />My mom is fucked up. The past few times I have called to say I am coming over to visit she has said no. Now that I think about it I have not been over there since she called and told me about Marc.<br />That was July.<br />I thought maybe she was on a bender? Well shit call it old ghosts I don't know.<br />Bonnie and I went over there and I could not believe my eyes when we walked in the door.<br />The house was like nothing I had ever seen before, cat food and maggots, empty food containers all over the place, and when I looked in the fridge it looked like she was living on popsicles and weird shit.<br />This is not my mom. She always had pride in her home. Always clean. <br />What is happening here?<br />It took us a whole day to clean it up. The poor cats.<br />We were told she has had a stroke and did not want anyone to know. Did she give up?<br />Keep living in the house but gave up.<br />I am so helpless right now.<br />What is wrong? She is being bounced back and forth between Kaiser and some old fucks home.Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-47963383852628599152010-07-04T19:21:00.000-07:002010-07-04T19:24:23.997-07:00September 20 2003<br /><br />We are getting a puppy!<br />Next Friday Mike is picking me up from work and we have to drive down to Gilroy to get him.<br />Today I am all alone wooooohoooo Mike went sailing with Val, I did not want to go its too hot.<br />I seem to be bugging him lately so some apart time is good. <br />Damn good!<br />wooohooooKellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-29214299666281454752010-07-04T19:14:00.000-07:002010-07-04T19:21:27.336-07:00August 20th 2003<br /><br />Sitting in front of the Slanted Door on the Embarcadero waiting for everyone to get here. Its Steve Foltz's goodbye party.<br />74 degrees out, the bay is blue with lots of boats.<br />I am very tired, no sleep last night. I keep having nightmares about Marc and wake up terrified, I have been e mailing Kent Miller about this.<br />Maybe some shaking beef and some spring rolls.<br />Here comes Tex.. walking down the street.. hard to miss that profile... <br />Beer sounds good now.Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-2256749904136726372010-07-04T19:12:00.000-07:002010-07-04T19:14:24.648-07:00Monday August 18th 2003<br /><br />Kate and Bloobas here all week!<br />One week until Bucks Lake.<br />I feel like I don't look too good lately.<br />Kind of run down.<br />Feeling a little conquered by the world.Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-85239772006252351902010-07-04T19:03:00.001-07:002010-07-04T19:11:26.327-07:00July 26th 2003<br /><br />Last weekend was the funeral, rosary Friday night, funeral Saturday.<br />I got a room at the Fairfax Inn so I did not have to drive back and forth.<br />Super Dave and I shared. Friday night Naves was all US.. must have been 200 people in there, laughing, crying.<br />John Hart had to be carried back to the hotel.<br />I don't think any of us really get it yet. <br />How could this happen?<br />Aug 29,30 going to Bucks to scatter ashes.<br />And kick some ASSSSSKellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-64069435682454218892010-07-03T19:33:00.000-07:002010-07-03T19:38:00.396-07:00July 15th<br /><br />Saturday was my moms birthday, Saturday was also the day that Marc ran into the devil.<br />Marc was murdered at Bucks Lake, the place he loved more than anywhere in the world, he felt safe and happy there.<br />How could this happen?<br />They found him laying in the road with a head injury, inflicted by 3 dudes, locals, hillbilly meth mother fuckers, that he had befriended that weekend, bought them drinks, partied with... <br />Is this a bad dream?Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-9092644552036333082010-07-03T19:31:00.000-07:002010-07-03T19:32:55.529-07:00July 11th 2003<br /><br />How am I supposed to go back to work Monday?<br />Can I please have a job in the town I live in?<br /><br />A bus came by and I got on .. help me .. help me...Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-49117947792088683312010-07-03T19:24:00.000-07:002010-07-03T19:30:54.237-07:00July 7th 2003<br /><br />Had a nice conversation last night with Mike Robb all about him.. shocker.<br />Oh my god, I still have a whole week off!<br />Wednesday:<br />I took out the old back rose bush which was on a stump?<br />Went to Home Depot and was shopping for a planter to replace it and I hear this "pssst.. hey Kellie" .. I knew who it was immediately, I know that psst anywhere.<br />Danny O'connor?<br />Turns out he is taking some classes at the college. Kids grown, Janet and him divorced, re hab.. etc... <br />Tomorrow off to Kellie Harts for some pool time.<br />Walked every day this week at 6:00 am .Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-88099313857886727312010-07-03T19:19:00.001-07:002010-07-03T19:24:34.294-07:00July 3rd 2003<br /><br />Left at 7:00 am and made it to Newport by 1:00 pm. Went to the old Josh Slocums which is now owned by Dennis Rodman? What a heatbag, the guy has this table in the back where chicks dance for him. He kind of has that town by the balls I think.<br />I had to e mail Kent Miller about this since that is where we shoved off on Vedura with Schill and Larry McNamara and Liz in 1980 whatever for one of the best weekends of my life.<br /><br />4th of July:<br />Sat by our pool all day in the hotel<br />Fireworks at Mollys friends house<br />Saturday:<br />Cruised around Balboa, lunch at Joes Crab Shack<br />Sunday drove home.<br />FunKellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-73092326819855138292010-07-03T19:15:00.000-07:002010-07-03T19:18:26.266-07:00Monday June 30th<br /><br />Saturday attended a Webber event at Sebastiani, Matt Adams, Jb, Dana etc.<br />Went to Murphys after for some fish and chips and brewskies.<br />Sunday had Johnny Moses up for a boat ride.<br />This week try and get all billing done so we can go to L.A and visit Molly Adams.Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-1309592134000969152010-07-03T19:12:00.000-07:002010-07-03T19:14:49.540-07:00Wednesday June 25th<br /><br />Woke up too early, it's warm even at 4:30 in the morning><br />Kitchen windows are open and jasmine is in full bloom - just that smell is enough to put one in good spirits.<br />It's almost light out.<br />Good coffeeKellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-71353871379961880162010-07-03T19:09:00.000-07:002010-07-03T19:11:58.386-07:00Monday June 23rd 2003<br /><br />I would like to get dressed one morning in my life where I do not feel like an absolute Jack Ass Dork Wad.<br />I can buy all the clothes in the world and still be a dork.<br />Plus its dark when I get up.Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-24074212954139094422010-07-03T19:04:00.000-07:002010-07-03T19:08:32.187-07:00June 21st 2003<br /><br />Summer Solstice: Walked 5 miles at 6:00 am before it got too hot. Mike going to the boat so have the house to myself all morning.<br />Plan is work in yard grocery shop and bbq later.<br />Things on the walk this morning:<br />Quail <br />Hot air balloons<br />Things in the yard that need work:<br />Veggie box<br />Hydrangea<br />Lavender<br />Fill birdbathKellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-71322530664995366172010-04-12T20:11:00.000-07:002010-04-12T20:13:42.630-07:00I am 44<br /><br />I do not want to go on dates<br /><br />Its just wrong<br /><br />I should be knitting doilies at nightKellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-45677002340963548132010-04-12T20:07:00.000-07:002010-04-12T20:10:04.336-07:008/14/2000<br /><br />So the date at Foothill went well the only problem was that I was nervous so drank too much and then told the guy I would see him the next day for his 50th birthday.<br />Instead I went to the airport and picked Karl up from his Europe trip. Totally forgot the other plan.<br />NICEKellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-3396776052806843422010-04-07T20:28:00.000-07:002010-04-07T20:34:27.368-07:008/10/2000<br /><br />Went to Archies for beerz last night. He is going to Tucson for a job interview next week to be a train conductor.<br />I am taking care of his cat while he is gone.<br />Going to Foothill Cafe tonight for dinner on a date.. yuk<br />I went to Target today and bought some pictures and stuff for the house.<br />I am going to start painting this weekend.<br />I suck at painting.Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-37968490220039407252010-04-07T20:19:00.000-07:002010-04-07T20:26:00.645-07:008/9/2000<br /><br />So if I thought I was depressed before I bought the house it was nothing compared to what happened when I moved in.<br />It was like I was in some one elses house, I was so messed up all I could do when I got home from work was sit on the couch. Frozen.<br />Could not wait for 4 am to come so I could go to work and feel like I belonged somewhere. I spent every weekend and most weekdays down in Marin I couldnt bear to be here. <br />I had to go to a shrink mostly because ABN provides it if you go mental and I was totally mental so I went.<br />It is now the end of Summer and I am going to live in my house and try and start over.<br />I think a kitten is in order!Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-35828232286734473522010-04-07T20:14:00.000-07:002010-04-07T20:19:23.797-07:004/20/2000<br /><br />Wake and bake .. get it 420<br />Wow after all the crap I have been through I am now a home owner. I sign closing papers on Monday!<br />Went to court yesterday and got the house. Archie went with me and my real estate agent Cindy.<br />Thank you God for a little time out on the recent shit fest.<br />I move April 29th<br />Get the keys on Eddies b day April 24th.<br />Dream come true.Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-87676258677450400732010-04-07T20:07:00.000-07:002010-04-07T20:13:39.712-07:004/14/2000<br /><br />FUCK<br />Yesterday Jeff Hauke had a fatal heart attack and died.<br />John Lawsons best friend two months later to the day.<br />I came into work and Linda told me and for the strangest reason I went to the floor because I could not comprehend it. <br />How can you tell me that my two best neighbors in West Marin, guys that ran double dipsea are both dead? <br />It is a very horrible cosmic joke.<br />Hey God.. suck my cockKellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-31991380557703179872010-04-07T20:04:00.000-07:002010-04-07T20:07:24.642-07:004/12/2000<br /><br />One week until court!<br />Plus next week is only 4 days, Friday off.<br />Yikes, I did something creepy, I went to a chat room and gave some guy my # and e mail address. YUK he sent his pic. Sold!!!!<br />This weekend hanging out with Super Dave, it's nice that after 8 years he is still in my life after all.<br />I feel better each day.<br />I am fun.<br />Someone will like me<br />SomedayKellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-19955019190743465602010-04-06T19:11:00.000-07:002010-04-06T19:14:52.516-07:004/6/2000<br /><br />Archies birthday this weekend. Bev and I are going up to his house for a bbq on Saturday. Super Dave and Big Carl are coming too and we can go over and check out my new "maybe" house.<br />Jane wants me at work on April 19th for expiration but if I have to I will call in sick,or late or desperate, I think I need this house more than Sun Micro pit needs me?<br />Going to Webbers on Sunday for a bbq.<br />I got a new account today!<br />More dough!Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-66976522371796124782010-04-06T19:06:00.000-07:002010-04-06T19:10:58.443-07:004/1/2000<br /><br />I have focused all my attention on buying a house. It's in Napa for christ sake.<br />Its cute and its what I can afford but it is a probate sale which means going to court and sealed bids. <br />Karl and I are trying to be friends but all he wants to do is hang out with Dumb and Dumber.<br />I find out on April 19th in court if I get the house!<br />Of course it's April expiration but Linda said don't worry you are going and you will get your house! She is the best.<br />Im scared.Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-34712647484448720012010-04-06T19:01:00.000-07:002010-04-06T19:05:23.567-07:003/13/2000<br /><br />Pain, pain and more pain. I feel like I am in a bubble floating through my days, not even knowing how I get through them. When will it stop? If one more fucker says you will get over it, give it time I will scream.<br />I e mailed Karl, I need him to explain this to me.<br />He wanted out long ago but didn't have the balls to be the first one to say it.<br />If he could just tell me I might be able to get pissed and move on.<br />Work is busy as shit and I feel like I might lose my shit.<br />It's just coming from every which way.Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8408867903061950698.post-80345152972806585212010-04-06T18:59:00.000-07:002010-04-06T19:01:18.847-07:003/8/2000<br /><br />I wish I didn't live in this town! I can't even shop at Mollie Stones because it reminds me of Karl everywhere I go.<br />It's been 12 days since I saw him or talked to him. Why do I keep looking back?<br />I made so many sacrifices for nothing.<br />I hate this place,<br />I think I would hate it no matter where I was.Kellie Miller Robbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17682922127692731561noreply@blogger.com0